Certified Best Day Ever

Photos by Billie Throm

Article by Reese Borchert

NEWBERG, Ore. – People born on April 1 have an extra reason to celebrate this year, following a recent scientific study.

First, the Institute of Birthday Superiority proved that these individuals are 67% funnier and measurably more delightful than the average person. The measurement was by “times giggled” in correspondence with “words uttered.” The independent variable and determinant for the X axis of “times giggled” was primarily toddler and those who self-identified as easily pleased and gullible.

Beyond their impact on others, these April Fool’s babies are better impacted by being made fun of because of their birthday. The data displays a heightened ability to take a joke and an increased tolerance for chaos. A lifetime experience of pranks surrounding their birthdays have led them to develop thicker skin and a refined sense of humor.

Although there is debate that these claims lack scientific reasoning, researchers say that the results “felt correct.” Further, George Fox University’s (GFU) own Astrology Club has confirmed the validity by surveying the entire population. 

Billie Throm, a GFU student born on April 1 confirms this data. “Yeah,” says Throm.

She was the participant in this study and the impressive 0% marginal error sparks GFU to invest further in the Astrology Club, developing this field into a strong masters program.

With this area of study attracting additional college attendants from the Portland area, the increased funding will be designated to offer more substantial scholarship packages to prospective students who report April 1 as their date of birth.